perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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