I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
