it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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