Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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