Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
