just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
