I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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