i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
my poor anus
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
