I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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