she was so not down for the gang bang
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Randomize
