Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
