Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
this will be a night to untag.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
