i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
