Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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