i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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