using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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