Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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