I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
How naked do you want me to be?
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