I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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