You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
