Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
