sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
