my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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