4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
