You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I need a beard to bite.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize