Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
