A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
If I die, sorry about rent.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
