we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
