so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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