It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
My legs feel like baby dolphins
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
