in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize