her vagine was all disorganized.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
even my farts smell like vagina
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
