Nicole vs. Life
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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