I'm jealous of your bromance
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize