Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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