Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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