Please, let me fuck your mom
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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