How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
