You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Randomize
