she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
