Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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