im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Randomize
