so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
