Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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