3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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