We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
