p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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