This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
