This girl is more easily done than said...
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
