Screwed.edu
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
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